You may assume by my 20 month absence that I've let the fires grow cold and you would be mostly correct.
After rereading my last post (I recommend it) I realize again the truth of it and how, short of any formal game playing or specified gender roles, the basic concept of male chastity continues to enrich our marriage.
Sharon seldom acts as chastity enforcer and I still selfishly satisfy my sexual urges on occasion but we have long recognized those tendencies in ourselves and each other and we choose not to dwell on them as disappointments just realities. The trick is to re-mount that horse.
In our case, remounting the horse tends to take the form of my plea for her to reassert herself and an effort on my part to dote on her in the ways I know she appreciates. I'm seldom rewarded in the way that I'd like but come to think of it disappointment is part and parcel of male chastity. None the less it does get me focused on trying to please her more and that is never a bad thing.
For her to acquiesce to my pleading requires a bit of effort on her part. Not so much physically but with her imagination which is often her stumbling block. Because she isn't inside my head (even after all these years of marriage and blog writing) I need to find ways inspire her to do the things she genuinely wants to do for me but feels too unimaginative or inadequate to try.
Recent events (that are of no concern to my readers here) have put me in a frame of mind where I'm feeling closer to her than perhaps ever. I want to stoke the fires and ignite a fresh sexual passion between us. Again our perspectives on what that looks like are opposite sides of the same coin. Naturally male chastity is a means to that end for me. Hopefully male chastity is the same means to the end she desires whether that be an increased feeling of closeness or just having the dishes done and her coffee made.
The greatest impediment to implementing an active male chastity regimen , is that when it is so much as alluded to it tends to immediately cause defensive walls to shoot up. The very thought of it reminds her of her perceived inadequacies and too often perception is reality.
It should go without saying (though I'll say it anyway), I'm not expecting an elaborate 24/7 hardcore dungeon dominatrix experience. Honestly. What it comes down to for me is her basic recognition that I am largely motivated by my strong sexual needs and her taking an active rather than laze-fair role toward them. She is keenly aware that sex is a major motivator to me, I just need her to express her recognition of that fact in a tangible way on a regular basis. Everything else will sort itself out.
Because she is my chief audience of this blog this is unashamedly self serving.
So the next question is how do we get going again and prevent her feelings of inadequacy in its implementation?
Step 1) Have her read this blog entry. (...Check)
Step 2) Give her a way to implement it that neither challenges her to think imaginatively or takes an inordinate amount of her precious time. (she is busy and has a demanding routine)
Here is what I am thinking...
Sometime in the two hours between rolling out of bed and walking out the door set aside 2 minutes on average as re-enforcement time.
For the imagination challenged a die can be cast to guide the session.
I may make a special die but a regular 6 sided die will work.
Think EDITOR as the acronym. Then using a simple substitution matrix...
1=Edge (Perhaps another dice roll to determine number of occurrences)
2=Denial (This might involve an another roll to determine the number of days)
3=Ignore (The least demanding of her time and attention obviously)
4=Tease (manual? verbal? ???)
5=Orgasm (one chance in six... I like those odds)
6=Ruined (The least desirable outcome pardon the pun)
(If the meanings or use of any of these terms in this context is a mystery to you... chances are you stumbled onto this blog by accident and should probably click the back button)
Obviously this would only be a tool to help her orchestrate a session and not a mandate for any particular outcome. In fact I imagine the result of the morning roll would likely be kept secret allowing her to choose another outcome should her mood or schedule dictate. Given my penchant for morning "wood" I suspect any of the above could be achieved in a two minute window.
There you have it my new and improved master plan. Suppose we can keep this one going without another 20 month break?